Premiere Week

Manny and I joke around that the stuff that happens to either of us would make a good reality show. For instance, last season's epic tale of waiting until a week before the lease at the old apartment was up before finding a new place to move, the concrete bathroom story arc, and the season finale when we finally got rid of the old whore landlord would've been an exciting TV season. The ratings would've gone through the roof, or more appropriately, the basement, causing it to flood whenever it rained.

I was ready for this season to be kind of boring. Because honestly, I'm kind of boring. All I do is go to work and watch HBO and play PlayStation and save babies and animals from burning buildings. Life is kind of like Dane Cook. It's mostly sucks and gets annoying and isn't remotely entertaining, except certain moments that are so magical, it makes you believe again.

For Dane Cook, it's the time when he went on Jimmy Kimmel and pretended to be Tom Cruise. He's not all that funny, as evidenced by Tourgasm (the worst show ever broadcast on HBO, the greatest network of our time), sometimes I wonder why he's so popular, then I get reminded of the Kimmel interview. He still sucks, but he has his moments.

For me, it's Manny getting mad at a customer at work and punching a wall and breaking his hand.

That's right, Manny went to work and got beat up by a wall.

And there's the first story arc for the new season. The possibilities are endless.